Confession Time

Okay, it’s confession time. I haven’t actually got a place in the Great North Run yet. In fact, there are a couple of the events which I have promised to take part in for the Weston Park Hospital Cancer Charity which I haven’t actually, in reality, got a place in just at this precise and exact moment in time. Okay, more than a couple. In actual fact, I haven’t got a place (as yet) in the Great Women’s Run, the Great Capital Run, the Great Wales Run, the Great North Swim OR the Great North Run. So, yes, what this actually and in reality means, I hear you cry, is that I haven’t got a place in HALF of the events which I have pledged to take part in this year.

Now I can appreciate that this looks bad. But there is a good reason for my non-inclusion in these events at this precise moment in time. Well, there is a good reason for me not having a place in most of these events, anyway – this good reason being that neither the Great Women’s Run, the Great Capital Run, the Great Wales Run nor the Great North Swim is open for entry, as yet. Once they are open for entry, I don’t think I’ll have a problem getting a place in them (at least I’m hoping not – But then again I grossly underestimated the amount of interest there would be and just how difficult it would be to get a place in the Great Manchester Run - as I explained in my last entry). Getting a place in the Great North Run, however, as I have discovered to my cost, is an entirely different matter.

According to Wikipedia, the Great North Run is “the World’s most popular half-marathon”. I did not know this. Similarly, I did not realise that quite so many nutters... sorry, people, would want to run 13.1 miles around Tyneside. It appears they do. In fact, so many of these fools... sorry, runners, want to enter this event that these days, in order to get one of the coveted 52,000 places you have to either enter as a priority entrant (which means becoming a member of the Great North Run, in other words – paying extra) or taking your chances in a ballot. Now, I am not, nor ever have been, the sort of person who leaves things to chance. There is a very good reason for this. I have to be the world’s unluckiest person. I doubt I could win a raffle in which only two tickets had been sold. I never, ever, win anything like that, which is what makes me feel so very worried about my chances of winning anything via means so dictated by luck as a ballot. It was this in view, therefore, that I tried to enter as a priority entrant. I tried. I tried to join as a new member of the Great North Run. Sadly, the website wouldn’t let me do it; and thus it was, in desperation that, on Christmas Eve, I rang the Great Run Team to find out how to become a new member thus rendering myself eligible to enter as a priority entrant. As I reported in my entry of 27th December, it was at that point in time that I discovered that they don’t just let any old riff raff amateur join. You have to be invited to join. After a brief conversation with one of the team, I was not left in any doubt as to whether someone such as myself could be included on the guest list. The answer was a big, fat, no.

So I did what I had dreaded doing in the first instance and left my entry to chance. Sadly, my worst fears were confirmed. Last week I received notification that I had failed to receive a place through the Daily Telegraph Great North Run Ballot. My entry would now be passed into the General Ballot, whatever that means. I’m concerned. I really am. I was concerned to the extent that I’m almost ashamed to report I sent an email which can only really be described as begging to the Great North Run team in the hope that they’ll take pity on me and let me have a place. Do I feel ashamed about this? Well, slightly – but judge for yourself how bad it is. Here’s what I wrote:

“I have today heard that I have not been allocated a place through the Daily Telegraph ballot in the Great North Run and that I have therefore been entered into the general ballot. I am not sure how many places are available through this but I am basically emailing you now to beg that I get a place in the Great North Run. On the entry form you did not give the opportunity to explain reasons for running and entrants were only permitted to indicate whether they would be running for one of your nominated charities.

I was not able to say that I would run for one of these charities because I have already promised that I would take part in ten of the "Greats" series of events in aid of the Weston Park Hospital Cancer Charity, which is one of only three UK based hospitals dedicated solely to the treatment of and research into cancer. It is also probably one of the only hospitals in the UK which runs a dedicated "Men's Cancer Care" campaign. I have pledged to supporters of the Weston Park that I will run nine of the "Great" runs and also take part in the Great North Swim.

I have promised to run the Great Winter Run (which I took part in last saturday - I came 1,235th and finished the event in 31 mins 27 seconds - I thoroughly enjoyed it - thank you); the Great Edinburgh Run (I have my place for this event); the Great Manchester Run(I have my place for this event too); the Great Women's run (entries not open yet); the Great Capital Run; the Great Wales Run; the Great Yorkshire Run (I have my place for this event); the Great North Run and the Great South Run as well as the Great North Swim.

I have a just giving web page at http://www.justgiving.com/valderbyshire describing the challenge I have set for myself and as you will see from this I have raised £365 so far in lieu of my completing the events. I have also raised a further promised £100 from a local company and my employer has indicated that they will match whatever I raise for the Weston Park. I realise that I really had no right to say I am going to take part in these events without having my entries in the bag beforehand, but the whole fundraising campaign has taken a great deal of organising and I've had to do a great deal of it in advance in order to raise the sponsorship - plus, I somewhat naively didn't realise that there would be a problem with gaining a place in these events. I thought I would just be able to get one.

Anyway, with all of the above in view, I would be very, very, very grateful if a place could be allocated to me in the Great North Run. My "Run the Greats 2009" campaign for the Weston Park Hospital Cancer Charity just won't be the same without it.”

I think they were sympathetic. They certainly responded in a timely fashion. They asked me if I qualified to become a priority member. Sadly, the answer was no. I have never before run the Great North Run nor ever before held membership of the Great North Run. (Let’s face it – I only started running a couple of months ago – the Great Winter Run was the first race I’ve run since sports’ day at school – which I seem to remember as being an entirely humiliating affair. The Great Winter Run is certainly the first race I’ve ever willingly participated in – I seem to remember being coerced into the sports’ day sprint thing which turned out to be such a disaster...) Anyway, to get back to the main point of this story: because I don’t qualify under their terms, I just have to take my chances. The response I received from them was as follows: “Thank you for your email. Unfortunately we cannot let you become a gold member this year, and we cannot guarantee that your place in the ballot will be successful as it is completely random. “

DOH!!!!! I could swear at this point. (I think I may actually have sworn quite badly when I first read the email, but I won’t stoop to that now). It’s the “random” factor which worries me the most - just because I am, as I have previously explained, so reliably unlucky in such matters. However, at this point in time, there is NOTHING I can do about this. I will just have to wait and see. Wait and hope that Fortune, for once, smiles in my direction in this matter.

So this is the reason I don’t have a place in the Great North Run at this moment in time and, what is more, and what is substantially worse, I cannot unequivocally promise that I will get a place and that I WILL run the Great North Run. To all of you who have already sponsored me to complete this event along with the nine others I have pledged to complete, I can only apologise sincerely if I don’t manage to get a place and promise (equally sincerely) that I will run an equivalent distance. Okay, if I don’t get a place, it won’t be the Great North Run – but I will run a half-marathon somewhere (although it might be around Bakewell or Sheffield... which... I have to say... is quite appealing because I won’t have to travel so far from home... But, this point aside, I will certainly do my best to get a place). Sadly, my best at this moment consists of crossing my fingers and hoping my luck will change.

To conclude this shameful confessional tale of woe on a positive point... I have, this week, confirmed my place in the Great South Run... But then again, you don’t have to enter a ballot for that one.